David and I have decided to keep our pregnancy on the down low for now. No one knows...not even our own children. I have told a few friends, but none that have contact with our family or would say anything. You know, this was a huge shock to us. We didn't react very positively either. We have four kids right now and we are struggling. Struggling to maintain order and struggle to make sure bills are paid. I swear, everyday the kids come home with another order form....pics, fundraisers, book fairs....neverending. I want my kids to have a comfortable life. Not to be spoiled, but not to miss out on too much either. So I was freaking about all that. David on the other hand was very content with that area of our obstacle. I didn't know this at the time. After a few serious discussions, I found he was actually freaked about just starting over. We were over the whole "raising babies" stage. We were ready to have our school children and throw ourselves into that. He nearly fainted in the baby aisle at Target a few nights ago...I kid you not.
So for now, this pregnancy will be kept from our family. I honestly don't see any one of them saying the slightest positive thing. I'm sure there will be a lot of, "You're crazy!" "FIVE?!?!" "Don't you remember how that happens?" "I thought you were getting your tubes tied?!" I really don't want to hear any of that. This was hard enough for us to come to terms on and the last thing I need is anyone telling me how we should live as a family. When I can no longer hide my belly, is when they will know. David and I will be strong enough and well equipped to verbally handle anything they throw our way at that point.
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